I joined because I saw my members saying good things about CumSlutFiance and I'm always interested in checking out the 'competition'. But I stayed and stayed because even though what Eva and I do is very different, I love her attitude and what she's built here.
As some of you know, I'm Dutch. My real name is Ursula van Meijer. I grew up in a small Dutch town about an hour's drive from Haarlem.
I laughed when I saw Eva say she'd never worn a plaid skirt when she was a girl. I wore nothing but plaid skirts, and white blouses and white stockings. I went to a very conservative, Calvinist all-girls school and I too, was a very good girl until I was about eighteen. Since then, I've worn a lot of school girl outfits again.
I was always tall and a bit. awkward. in my teens but when I hit sixteen I suddenly fleshed out, and out. and out. Even though I was very shy and well behaved I was always in trouble in school. I just looked bad. I had green eyes and dark hair, the devil's combination and I made the teachers nervous. I had no idea about boys. My parents were not strict but I was shy and a bit awkward.
Then I went to technical college in Amsterdam to study textile manufacture. I'd somehow imagined that there would be many girls, becuase, well, clothes and fashion. No. I was the only girl on the course and the technical college was 90% boys.
I arrived like a being from outer space. Free of my school uniform and in the late eightees, I wore short dresses and pantyhose. I got a tight crop haircut and I went to dance parties. There were boys everywhere. In clubs, in school, on the street. I was so, so horny but I was kind of intimidating looking and the only boys who approached me were the kind I didn't like. Too pushy and cocky. I wanted a nice boy.
At first I had lived in a student dorm but that was only for a first semester. I moved into a student apartment with another girl and two boys from the college. Then the girl moved out almost immediately and another boy moved in, so me and three boys. They were all in the same technical course of software engineering. Very nerdy. Computer games. Electronics. RPGs and card games. They were scared of me. I was taller than all of them and even just after one semester, I was more worldly. I went to dance clubs and to bars. They stayed at home, drank beer and played games.
At Christmas though, there was a college ball - bands and beer in tents on the campus and they all went and I went with them. They drank and I insisted they dance with me. The music was great but it ended early and so I persuaded them to go on to a dance club with me. We danced more and more and I started to put my arms around their shoulders and put my hands on their arms.
Back at the apartment I put on some music and turned down the lights. I stood in the middle of the room and said I wanted them all to have sex with me at the same time. Bear in mind I was a virgin up to then and I think they all were too. Dieter said he'd had a girlfriend but nobody with that many toy soldiers has a girlfriend.
Victor was tthe first to respond. He asked if I was sure. That made me glad. They were nice boys. I didn't want rough. Not then. They really didn't know what to do, and neither did I but asked Victor to come, peel down my dress and expose my boobs. I sat between him and Martin on the setee. It felt nice. They were excited but trying not to show it. I told them not to pretend to be cool. They could look and touch me all they wanted. I said I knew they were virgins, and I didn't care. I wanted to have sex with them. They didn't have to pretend with me, I just wanted to be touched. They actually needed quite. a lot of encouragement. I nodded and said it felt nice when they caressed my breasts. I moved thier hands for them, said they could feel all they wanted. I kissed each of them and said we could take all the time, all night. Soon I had six lovely hands on me, feeling and kneading me and touching me.
I'd been a bit nervous before but now I was on fire. I loved this, how it made me feel. How it made them feel. I was talking a lot and telling them what I wanted and how much I was looking forward to it and I wanted them to do the same but they were so shy and nervous and self conscious. At one point I even stopped and said if they wouldn't talk I would just go to bed alone. Thankfully they complied because there was no way I could have followed through on my threat.
I had to all the work - tell them what to do, to take off my clothes, take out their cocks - everything. But I had chosen shy boys because I was unsure and they were so keen. I encouraged them to finger me and rub my pussy. I knew how to masturbate of course and I showed them how to do it for me with their hands. When they had got it well enough, I had one rub my clit and one suck on my titties and I told Victor I wanted to put his penis in my mouth. I had seen this in films but I'd never done it. As soon as his cock was in my mouth and I sucked he came immediately. His spunk jetted into my throat and I was surprised but I kept sucking and I put my arm around him so he wouldn't pull out. He was so sorry but I said not to worry and he would be able to keep going soon. I swallowed it all of course and then I moved him to my boobs and got Martin to stand up so I could suck him. I felt it this time when he was cllose and I took it out and put him back to my pussy and sucked Gregor for a whille. I told them it was okay if they came, They were young and could do it again in a minute. Of course it took longer, but now with me naked and so sexy they were hard soon enough. I wanted to suck them more and I wanted cocks in my pussy but I wanted them to last longer too. I brought them into my bedroom, which was the biggest and said they could each come in my mouth and then whoever could get hard again first would be in my pussy, so I sucked one and then the other, lying on my back. That felt wonderful and already. I was creative. I tried to get them to the point at the same time with my mouth and my hands and as they got close I said they should do it on my breasts. It was messy but a lot of fun and I loved their faces as they came on me. I slurped it off and Victor wiped me with a towel. He was hard again already and I lay on my back and he pressed it into me. He was so gentle and I wanted it hard straight away. I put my arms around the other two and held on as he did me and it felt wonderful. I remember saying to them. 'Tell me I am beautiful.' and they did and it felt so great. I got Martin to switch in and I told them to put their hands all over me. I wanted to be touched and felt everywhere. They all did me like that, just on my back. I didn't even think to try a different position and I had orgasms and I sucke
d them more from my back. It took longer for them to come of course and I got them to rub my piussy and my breasts as I was getting fucked. I told them to keep talking more and say I felt good and how good I made them feel.
I have done maybe a hundred gangbangs and blowbangs on film ever since, and that one was maybe not the best, but it was so special to me, I had an amazing time. I felt so good, so free, like I had been let out of a jail I didn't even know I was in. I slept between Martin and Victor that night, semen still oozing from me and I knew I wanted this all the time.
In the morning I woke with them on either side of me and I lay awake for a while feeling their body heat and inhaling their smell. I got horny all over again and I masturbated lying between them, thinking about how it had felt the night before. Victor's eyes opened and I made a shushing sound and looked into his eyes as I got off while he watched me.
I loved doing that too and when I was done he said he loved me and I just smiled and told him I loved him but Martin and Gregor too.
But that was in the future. Overnight I turned into a raging sex kitten. I wanted sex all the time. I was nineteen and I had a libido that never stopped. I would have had sex every hour of every day if I could, and luck for me I had three horny young men with me all the time.
I tried not to let it harm my studies but now my inner demon was out it would not go back to sleep easily. I struggled to pass my exams. When I was home I wouldn't be able to stop myself with my three boys and when I would start with one I would want the others to join in. From the beginning I wanted the feeling of more than one guy. Sometimes they would say to me that they wanted to do it with me alone and I would say okay but when I was the one to start, which was most of the time I would want them together, at least two, and all three if possible. Of course, they wanted me alone more but not only did I prefer multiple partners I also thought it would mean less jealousy but I was wrong. I passed my exams, but only barely and I knew I would not make it through my second year if I kept going as I was. I decided I would drop out of college for a year and try to get my tumultuous sexual desire under control before returning to school. Of course, I decided to do this by letting it rage out of control and see if it would burn itself out. I got a job at a dance club working behind the bar. It was a fetish kind of place near the red light district. There I saw all kinds of things which shocked and then excited me.
I was still living with my three guys and things were getting out of control. Gregor and Martin wanted to enjoy their Summer, working temporary jobs and playing their games and maybe going to bars. They loved having their tall sexy girlfriend but now I was going out every night and taking drug and I wanted more and more kinky sex and this wasn't where they wanted to go. Victor would have done anything for me and with me but for me, it was all or nothing. I wanted more guys, more excitement and he wanted me to be his alone.
I'd tried to be as honest as I could with them from the start and I knew it could not last like this and it would all end in tears so I decided to move out. One morning I gathered them together and said I had to leave. I explained I wanted to do so many things and I knew they didn't and I wouldn't break up their friendship so I was going to leave. Victor understood. I think he knew that we would never be together like he wanted. Martin was so sad and Victor cried. It was painful but I was so glad I did this when I did. We were able to remain friends and if I'd stayed it would have ended in rows and accusations.
I moved to an apartment on my own and began to make new friends. There was a girl who visited the bar who always seemed to be with a different guy every night, but she wasn't one of the prostitutes. I asked her what her secret was and she told me she worked in porn and her dates were male porn actors.
This was Lydia Herman, thought she wasn't called that then. At the time I never thought of working in porn but I wanted what she had and she was cool and funny and didn't have an agenda like so many of the women who came to the club.
I just straight out asked her if she would bring me on one of her dates and we could both sleep with her guy. She asked if I'd ever been with a girl and at first I didn't understand what she meant. I'd just thought we would both have sex with him but she assumed I wanted to sleep with her too. I'd never considered that but straight away it sounded good. I said I hadn't but I was up for anything. Anal? She asked DP? I didn't really know what that was but I just said 'Anything'. That was how I was then.
She made a couple of calls straight away and later on two guys showed up together. They ordered drinks with Lydia and I tried not to get fired by spending too much time talking to them when I should have been serving customers. When I got off my shift we almost raced back to Lydia's, which was nearest. Those two guys were Anders B and Kurt Niedelaum. Anders wento on to be in loads of porn movies, many with me and Lydia. Kurt was a director and he was so funny and cool but he died of an overdose in 2001.
At Lydia's place I moved to a whole new level. Being with her was incredible and Anders and Kurt were so uch more aggressive and powerful than my three boys. I loved being DPd. I'd never done anal before and I liked it but being DP'd, especially when they were standind and they lifted me off my feet was so incredible that I wanted it over and over. More than just the sex though, being with these people made me feel like I was where I was meant to be. I knew I would never go back to college and there was a career in porn was just waiting for me.
Of course, I was never going to be a classic porn star. I was just too tall and my looks were never going to sell for mainstream. But Germany and Scandi countries like Amazons and Valkyries and Lydia said I could have a long career if I was careful and looked after myself.
Within a month I was doing my first scene. Knowing Kurt helped. He put me straight into a feature for a German movie house which did bukkake and always wanted unusual looking girls. On that set was my first time taking a facial and my first time doing more than two guys. I liked filming. I just was myself. Being made up and the outfits were great and although there was a lot to learn I just took to it like a bird learning to fly.
And it was also the lifestyle. I would work all day and then go to bars and pick up guys or make hookups with other actors. I wanted sex and I also wanted to be with other people who felt the same. I wanted to wake up in a bed, sticky with with men and women together and go striaght back to it. I loved being wanted and I wanted everyone I saw. I slept with lighting guys and sound guys and the girls who did hair and makeup. I slept with random men from bars and women from the supermarket. I gave it all away and had more and more to give. My plan to let my fire burn out had worked like pouring on petrrol.
Soon I moved to be in the stable of girls with Friedrich Films. They really wanted me to do femdom. I was tall. I looked like a demoness and I was totally uninhibited. But I'd never done anuything like that, and as you all know, there's more to femdom than just looking good in leather. So Anders introduced me to Will Lagens who worked as an actor on femdom films. He taught me how to act and what to say and how to bring out my inner stern mistress. When I met him I knew straight away he was special. It was funny. He would be explaing how to have the right tone and the attitude and all I wanted to do was kiss him and hold onto him. I told him how I felt and he said I told everyone I loved them, which was true. It took weeks before he realised I really meant it. I said I would give up porn for him, be just his woman, but he didn't want that and anyway, he could see that this was what I was meant to do.
We moved in together in Berlin and he persuaded me to look after myself more. I stopped going to bars and cut out drugs altogether. I made more and more movies - it was around the time porn really boomed on the internet. I met up with Victor again and Martin and they made a site for me and we rekindled our relationship. They liked Will a lot and though Gregor didn't want to join us, it felt again like the old times. I would wake up in bed with them all and lie awake listening to them breathe and rubbing myself.
I had three children with Will. They are 4, 6 and 8 now. Every yesr I think I will retire but there are still fans who want to see me having sex and I run my own site with Will and it keeps going. Last year I was given a 'Veteran's' award by the German porn industry which was nice in a way but I feel more like a matriarch than a porn veteran. I have enjoyed every minute of it all. I have sex at least twice a day, sometimes many more times. When I meet fans at conventions they tend to be a bit older and they reminisce about great scenes I did twenty years ago which I barely remember. Every day I hug Will and tell him how much I love him. He smiles and says I love everyone. I do.
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