Porn Mommy Issues

We have to talk about Eva.

Or rather, my fucked-up relationship with her.

I've made four PMVs of Eva. That's three more than any other pornstar. I have written a novel, or rather, am writing a novel, already longer than War and Peace, called 'Eva's New Lifestyle.' I can pretend it's not about her, but on every page, I've put a picture of Eva Lovia, so who am I fooling? I've written blog posts about her, posted captioned pictures of her. I've downloaded and then deleted over a Terrabyte of her videos and pictures. I love her. I hate her. I don't hate her. She makes me crazy.

My most viewed and downloaded PMV is one of Eva where she gently encourages the viewer to masturbate while she is fucked by her lover. I spent many many hours on it, like the other three which are entirely composed of her videos. Hours staring at her. Listening to her. Admiring her. Adoring her.

 

I joined both of the personal websites Eva created. I joined her onlyfans. I got a twitter account purely so I could follow her. I have bought many, many of her videos. I have probably watched her on some form of media, more than any other woman. 

But I can't stand her. After the JOI video blew up, I re-downloaded some of her videos so I could finish a different one of her that I'd started. I called the folder I put them in 'EvaForMySins'. In a blog post I likened her to Anne Boleyn, who Henry killed but could not excise from his life. 

So, the other day, I opened her twitter, which I had unfollowed, just to see how she is doing. 

And it all came back. She has a podcast now. Of course she does. A Trump-supporting podcast. I read some of the synopsis and her comments. I listened to a couple of episode. Oh God, how can this be her? How can the woman I want her to be, be so very different to the woman she actually is? Spoiled. Self-obsessed. Reactionary. Right wing. Self-satisfied. Uncaring.

"The women’s march does not represent all women. It does not represent me or my beliefs."

"How is using the term mansplaining anytime a man speaks not sexist? Thinking women need SJWs to defend them from conversation is indirectly saying women aren’t capable of going toe to toe with a man. Why is it the progressives want to keep us moving backwards?"

She goes on and on and on like this.

I know, I know. There's absolutely no reason why she should be any other way than she is. The woman in my mind is just my wish fulfillment projected onto porn. It's not like she pretended to be a progressive in her videos and her views in real life are different. She never expressed any views while she was shooting porn. Who would? Eva Lovia isn't her real name. She doesn't even really have a porn 'persona'. There's nothing there. Why would there be? The person in my head is a product of the thousands of hours of video and writing and obsessing that I did, not anything she ever did or said.

It's just, just, that she's SO different. So objectionable. Of course she loves Trump, guns, money, spiritualism. She's anti-vaccination, covid-sceptical and against civil rights. If there's a compassionate political position, then she's on the opposite side. Pro Gun. Pro Life. Pro Cop. Making America Great Again.

I wish. I wish I'd never found out any of this. Or re-discovered it all again. Be warned. Never meet your heroes. Don't even follow them on twitter. Or read their blog. And for God's sake don't listen to their podcast. Unless it's David Tenant. He's okay. His podcast is wonderful. Listening to him chat with Ian McKellan or Stacey Abrams is a joy. But I can't get quite as excited about seeing him in opaque pantyhose. Or anyone else for that matter. It has to be Eva. She is my Porn Mommy. If only I could forget her.

Perfect Porn# 5 Natashas Bedroom Cuckold Therapist

Natasha's Bedroom

So, this is a little different, and maybe if you've read the others this will be a bit of a handbrake turn, but this is my list, so skip ahead or maybe keep going.

Natasha, no surname, has a clips4sale site at Natasha's Bedroom at Clips4Sale

It is by far my favourite clips4sale site, and she is really wonderful, even though 75% of her stuff doesn't interest me at all.

All her videos are solo - talking to camera, femdom stuff. So far, so ho-hum. But yes, she's different. For a start she's very pretty, and (spot the theme here) she can really act. She sells the premise of each video with all her might and she packs a lot of emotional punch in her small frame.

The scene I've particularly picked is from this video 

Natasha's Bedroom.   Cuckold Therapy

In the 10 minute film, Natasha is your therapist and you've come to her because of your small penis and inablity to satisfy your wife. She has a look at your little penis, agrees that you are very small, way, way too small to satisfy a woman and suggests you encourage her take other lovers with big fat cocks who can satisfy her while you fluff for her, watch and masturbate.

I bet there are one hundred other videos on clips4sale with the same premise, but they're all garbage and this one is incredible. It's her delivery that makes it not just stand out, but reach out and grab you by the brain. "Think about your wife getting fucked." She says. Anyone could write that line and say it. But her delivery lifts it out of the ordinary. The way she says "fucked" is perfect. Shit, the way she says 'Think about' is perfect.  Obviously it's hard to describe her tone and manner and the image doesn't do it justice, but take it from me, Natasha knows how to say "fucked."

In this, as in pretty much all her videos she's playful, gentle, and completely dominating. She delivers lines in a helpful, intimate way, and the lines burn. "You're going to be thinking about your wife getting pounded by other men with big fucking fat cocks." A lesser woman would scowl, Natasha smiles a great big smile as she says this, fingering a huge black dildo. That smile is everything. If she barked out her lines with a frown it would fall flat. With the smile, she sells it. You will be thinking about it. I'm thinking about it now.

The video is 10 minutes long and ends with a countdown and a CEI bit at the end. All ten minutes is pure gold but there are several points where she starts talking about cleaning up after a gang-bang and listening through the bedroom wall, to her getting pounded in the bedroom. During these parts, it goes platinum.

Mid way through, she pulls down her top and her bra, just enough to expose her nipples and she plays with them as she encourages you to jerk off. She pops them back in again to get out her demonstration big black dildo cock, then takes them out again as she spells out how you're cuckold lifestyle is going to be from now on. "The last time you had sex? That's the last time you'll ever have sex.'. She's understanding, but firm. "I know it's a little distressing to think about, but this is your new normal."

She did a follow-up for this one, where she's sitting on a chair and you can see her legs better. It's a lot more about enforced chastity and it's pretty good too but this first one is a stand-out exception. Her best work.

I don't think the video would really "reprogram your fantasies" as she says - if you're not into femdom cuckold stuff you'd probably turn off after ten seconds, but if you do have this kink, there's nobody better and this is her best video so far.

Natasha posts a lot. A lot of it is CEI stuff and poppers and chastity which is okay, but not really my thing. It's all femdom, but only 1 in twenty videos are really cuckold videos and of them there's only a handful of good ones.
She never does anything but solo and rarely goes further than topless but for me, she's still the best femdom performer out there because her voice and acting are so spot on. I highly recommend you go peruse her material and see if there's anything you like. You won't be disappointed.

Eva Lovia. Cuckold Caption. The way she looks at him.

The way she looks at him.

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The way she looks at him.
Does she know she’s doing it? Does she even care?
When I agreed. When I gave in. She said it would just be one time. Then it was another time. Then just one more.
She said it was just sex. That he scratched that particular itch she had. That it would make ‘us’ stronger.
But when she comes back after being with him, she just rolls over and sleeps. When we do have sex, she just seems bored. And when she pretends to be into it, it’s so obvious, it hurts so bad.
But the way she looks at him. It’s like a knife in my heart.
And she doesn’t care.